Confusion vs Chaos

 

 

Fallin' in Love

 with 

someone who

 has never been in love 

the way 

i could love them 

if they

 were wholly unbroken

9hrs of unAduLTerated sLeep

 Clytii - Dorali - LoLiTa - Myndi - Nora - Sapphira - Savannah

CLYTII = Mythological water nymph who loved the sun god Helios. She was changed into a sunflower and now always turns her face toward the sun.

Dorali = Gift..

Lolita = Sorrow.

Myndi = Reference to the Virgin Mary.

Nora = Abbreviation of Eleanora 'light' and Honora 'honor. '.

Sapphira = Sapphire (gem); beautiful. Jewel. That relates or tells.

Savannah = From the open plain.

insomnia & i 

have been bed buddies for approximately a year now.

but last night, i had almost 9 full hours of sensational slumber.

believing it to be attributed to my new heated blanket, woke up remembering the last thing i drank...

Green Tea w/Ginseng.

Ginseng aka: Eleuthero

not to be confused with 

“eleutheromania,”

= Eleutheromannia actually means “a manic yearning for freedom.”

Since Feb 21

 

Define TALKING myself out of... 

DELTA East

or 

Sierra Middle East ?

Unfortunately for me

 i didn't write anything here. 

however, i can say that I didn't Kiss anyone on NYE. 

I was home by 930pm. 

sometimes B Louis confuses me. 

but now, FFwd to April 13, 2021 =  things are progressing quietly, yet yummy. 

 day one:  blackness mixed with Sunshine.  1694 extra pix, sent from Universe.  Busted!!  ................ family time, Eyes for completion of thought coupled with 'are you really here?"  Little black dresses & muck boots. Revisiting honeyBeeXe.  Methodical, strong, agony & attentive.  Chivalry is Not dead.  Alone time. Your Jewel works like mine.  Story for another day aka: Promise of Tomorrow.  Told story for both oldest and youngest.  Youngest, "Santa Claus, huh?"  Those eyes! 

day two:   realizing BGT set me up for ability to listen over and again. 

day three:  butterflies. Trying to remember I'm only here for Healing x 2.

day four:    accidental touch or not?

day five:    short-lived due to dysfunctional greedy family members

Healing is Hard! 

Thanksgiving

 Thanks for giving... 

Giving of Thanks.

is sort of a double edged sword

i dont resent them

as a whole

i resent they were not whole! 

in beginning of courtship they led onto my belief in them as being a confident source.

as time, only six months

passed

whom I thought was a Fonz

was actually 

a Potsie.

while although i am highly inept to figure you out in just a few seconds

not all the YOUs

it was difficult as

this particular You

worked out of state for three of the six months.

side note:

narcissistic tendencies

talks out of turn

talks to compare/compete

listens to talk

doesn't listen & others have to repeat themselves

side note:

you were forewarned the reason I would leave you for, ever... 

things, which came b4 your health 

-Everything-

boats

gambling

smoking

drinking

demanding .. out of her comfort zone

racist

liar-covert

narcissist-covert

pushover

gullible

balls to ask her for an investment in the SmokeShack

 

'RonaVirus lingering

 Officially
 I'm over The-Virus.  
however, this
 Insomnia byproduct is slowly workin' itself out. 
At least now
 I'm able to fall asleep and 
have a few hours of slumber 
before waking in the middle of the night. 
 Hence this early morning
 out of nowhere post. 'need 2 post'. 

UniversaL DeaLings

the one wish episode #17billion and counting...

i offered Bunny's "great idea" in 2016 
and today there have been multiple Tornado Warnings!

universally speaking, U work fast!

define artistry...

BLueBerrY Reunion

still connecting dots...

Our, might be an overstatement...

the Steve McQueen, speaking of Queens, lookalike

coupled with for a lack of better words

the 

Days of Our Lives...

I've spent the last 66ish days alone

here @ the Wind Farm.

At my arrival, I was on the heels of death.

not my own heels.

Death of a loved one here @ the Farm. 

I left my windChimes behind when I moved.  Technically, they weren't solely my windChimes...  

But upon arrival, I was greeted with almost the best ever.  

Sadly, they belonged to "the coolest gal ever"; or so I've been told.

Since then another death has crossed the farmLands.

Sister Ratt. 

She'll be missed.  Even though I don't own that gene.

Today is the day after Sister's death. 

where was I?

oh yah...

Blueberries, almost McQueen and the Days of our Lives... 

God Bless the Wind

Farms... 

am believing

my Reunion

will be 

2nd Grade

at Best! 

Needs

@ least 3 chairs

most significantly

just one.

Sees

knees & coffee

orange flames & ice blue eyes

spring time & frolicing 

summer & sweat

autumn & heat

winter waiting

Five months down...

October:

• met barley
• met Fallon
• regained some independence
• ate lots of cheddar peppers
• drank lots of ddp
• began operation::: split19

November:

• cadence moved my boxes

changed words to I'll be home for Christmas

• bought a puppy
• said final goodbye to Emmer
• closure with Barley

December:

• lost Andrew Shawn
• lost Cadence
• lost puppy
• left for good

New Year's Eve:

• kinky grapefruit
• cowboys galore
• besties
• 🍉
• o watt a feeling dancing on the ceiling...

January:

• intrepidation
• introvert
• intuition
• intelligence
• intriguing
• infraction
• & intermittent coddling

February:

• Koontz
• dead people
• above average bear
• role-play
• Judson road
• quiet strangers
• pits, curs, labs
• music and...

Forgets to Remember

ya know how you want to write down every dang day. 
but you forget.
then when you want to remember
you realize
you forgot!

something about don't put off til tomorrow what you can do today.

day of the day
to write down
what you
want
to remember. ...

starts like this:
up early, as usual.
let puppies out
didn't feed Emmer.
computed
wrote down money ideas
on front porch.
well, not on the porch but while sitting there.
threw out bags into truck.
took nap.
i remember arguing with self
throughout entire dream
of how you were gonna be
in so much trouble
cuz you took a nap.
cuz you were not fulfilling the masters' list of duties
for you.
strangely you slept for 3 hrs.
puppies out again.
fed Emmer.
was happy the chicken
had been in sink for hours
its currently baking 425*
is still funny about the fat bombs & Xylitol.
define poise!

July 6 - one month later

walking papers...

Direct Massage

http://victoryhomoeo.org/frozen-shoulder-adhesive-capsulitis/

on the inflamed areas is what has worked 

the best for me.  I had a rotator-cuff injury May 2006.  

February 2019 is when the Adhesive Capsulitis aka: Frozen Shoulder began. 

The first month was almost complete limited motion. 

I used TheraTape to alleviate stress on certain muscles, which were becoming 

inflamed and rather sore due to the impending freezing stages. 

I also used a combination of Tiger Balm, Icy Hot-Lidocane, and Icy-Hot creams.

However, the best treatment, in my opinion was direct massage to the inflamed areas.  

This was done by either manual manipulation or by getting a friend to use their fingers, elbows, chin(lol), and heels of feet to penetrate the sore areas.  With each bout of massage

the movement in my arm became looser and easier to move in many directions. 

It is now only four months into Frozen Shoulder and I am back to driving and water aerobics. 

jerks

abound. ...

i just want to say a sentence.  a complete sentence before being interrupted!

jerks

abound. ...

i just want to say a sentence.  a complete sentence before being interrupted!

a few of my new ...

favorite things ...

OMG, how Stupid ...

can peeps be?

After almost 25 yrs of internet scams, why are there so many people whom are still believing that there is some sort of innocence factor to the inter-webs?    And the news, do you people not pay attention to the live-streaming-media.?

If you think you are talking to someone, especially some much younger, and you think you're going to get a tit4Atat, so to speak...  you are being scammed and in older/younger series, you are most likely talking to a federal agent!...

what a freaking bunch of numskull loser morons, you are!

Texas

the entire month of April & 17 days of May...

non-thrifty for certain...

Four Days in a Row...

High Caliber:
Coffee
Guns
Hogs
Juice
Machines
Presence
Presents
Quests
Solutions
Tech
Velocity
Zzz's

2% Pig on full throttle

You Win Universe

my morning(waking up timeframe) went like this...

*mucking around in thought* with Howard Mitchell Hawthorne VIII ...   we contemplate the job coupled with the duties, which sends me to a compilation of conversation with HamChunk...  within this parley of reflection HamChunk and I cover millions of $$ of financial obligation!! 

take a few steps back into last night, as I was taking control of the Texas A&M downy comforter, I came across my tried & true Universe-seeker-meditational-book...  the same book where its Words of Wisdom sealed the deal during Operation: almost-Savannah White-Truck Life-changer Expedition... 

step back into current Time(minus the HourGlass built to perfection by the deepest darkest Chocolatier of all time); and the title for today from the book = Financial Goals.

One Year Later

that pretty girl's heart hurts. 
but not mine.
i think this is cuz you were a much better gf than you were a f. 

This 2018-2019 Year

has been quite reflective for me.

aLL aBoard

TRAIN:
a line or procession of persons, vehicles, animals, etc., traveling together.

The Miracle Healing of Manuka Honey - Dr Alan Mandell, DC

What I have Learned about ...

Gut Bacteria.

Apples make me belch.
Apple Cider Vinegar does not.
Onions make me belch.
Raw Honey does not.

Day Four - Every night I eat Sauerkraut & homemade dogs. Sometimes onions. 
Dessert is a hotel-cup full of Blackberries & Cranberries w.fresh squeezed Lemon.

speakin' of Tornado ALLeY

dear Mike W...
J. Ray, didn't have a dog in the fight.
i was disappointed you didn't make the trip.
i guess, it's up to the CIA now!

56) FBI agents will be working without pay as of Jan. 11. The FBI Agents Association says the shutdown will hamper recruiting efforts.

Dreaming @ Gene's

soymilk and I were @ his fave fish-house.
i had BK original chick-sandwich.  and fish-fries.
unsweetened Tea w/crushed ice.
i Love this PLace.

doc appointment on Monday.
"they" say, Gastroparesis usually only happens in T1D patients.  Obviously, i like to break all the molds.
Speakin' of molds...
Today is the first day where I haven't Belched my head off...
blood sugars were 77 & 76, this morning.  i slept til 15mins to eleven...  then again til almost 2p.
after the day, no meds(as a test), chick sandwich, fries, and a mini ice-cream sandwich(all bad)... BS=321.  OMG!!

only pain i currently have is my R. elbow!

oh and the DREAMING...
movin' to Tornado Alley

magic

struggling with words...
this phone turns on  and it was 12:17 midnight...
i was listening to Kutless - That's What Faith Can Do!!

then i couldn't put a meaning to the moment.
time changed to 12:18.  volume was 52. 
today, now being 10.10.18

so, maybe a Christmas Gift!

don't Yank my chain...

 video. LOL

Peanut Butter & CeLerY

Packin' Pancakes

Verse of the Day

You’re blessed when you stay on course, walking steadily on the road revealed by God. You’re blessed when you follow his directions, doing your best to find him. That’s right—you don’t go off on your own; you walk straight along the road he set. You, God, prescribed the right way to live; now you expect us to live it. Oh, that my steps might be steady, keeping to the course you set; Then I’d never have any regrets in comparing my life with your counsel. I thank you for speaking straight from your heart; I learn the pattern of your righteous ways. I’m going to do what you tell me to do; don’t ever walk off and leave me.

Psalm 119:7 MSG

Burnt Gym